Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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