Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
