I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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