you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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