Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
