I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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