We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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