I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
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