No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
