Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
