some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Randomize
