Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
