I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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