At least make sure they are 18
Why
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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