How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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