Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize