shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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