What did we do last night that was yellow?
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
