Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
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