Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
