Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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