If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
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