I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
