jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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