Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize