I need help removing her.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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