She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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