How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize