she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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