So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
i think my cat just said my name.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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