Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
her vagine was all disorganized.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
