I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize