Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Randomize
