the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
