I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
