I am puke
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
