Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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