i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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