capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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