PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize