too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
operation have a gay friend backfired
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
