At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
