What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
