Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Congratulations! We have a period
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
