My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
