No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
