too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
