Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
