its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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