I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Randomize
