I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
