I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
