First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize